I put on my super-tight jeans and asked Mudwarden if he wanted to accompany me into the swamp. After updating his life insurance, he agreed to come along. We had the most beautiful weather you can imagine. The sky was completely clear, the sun was warm, there was nary a breeze blowing, and the tide was about as good as we could have expected this time of year.
Fortunately, we got out there about 30 minutes before the tide was all the way out. We were able to start playing as soon as we arrived, and we had over an hour to enjoy the mud before the tide rolled back in.
I recorded a drama in my tight jeans with my hands tied behind my back. Mudwarden helped me a little with some of the camera shots (you probably guessed that I had a reason for inviting him along). The place I selected for my on-camera demise was really thick, and I sank with my legs straight down. It was a really slow sink, as I worked my feet deeper without the use of my arms (they were tied behind my back, in case you forgot). I wish I could have gone down faster. I hate it when the sinking scene takes over 20 minutes. I know some people like the agonizingly slow sink. I prefer the illusion of being sucked under. Someday, I’m going to find a swamp squid that will pull me under the mud while I struggle to keep breathing.
After we finished our adventure in the thick mud, we took our time cleaning up and paddling back. The weather was so nice, I didn’t want to return to the stress of civilization. There is just no way I can tell you how beautiful it was, out there on the water. The sky was deep blue, the fish were jumping, and the birds were chirping. The mud ducks were diving for fish, and the turtles were sunning themselves.

































