Tag: mental health

Emotional Health & Self Bondage

John Marsh was in need of a mental health day, so he put himself in a painful, progressively tightening self bondage, at the mercy of a timer that would hold him for 35 minutes. That may not sound like a long time, but John knew that the ropes around his genitals were going to be very tight and this predicament was going to get painful after just 10 minutes.

John’s wrists were locked in leather cuffs and the cuffs were roped to the wall, opposite the rope wrapped multiple times around his genitals and rigged so that a weight could take up any slack, but John couldn’t pull that slack back. He was gagged and his ankles were cuffed and locked around a steel post. In this position, John could barely move, and if he tried to get some slack by pulling against his wrists and thrusting up his hips, that slack would be taken away and his situation would be that much tighter.

Of course, John did this as a way of centering himself, mentally. Although it was painful for 20-25 minutes and he had no choice but to tolerate the pain or struggle to find a less painful position; even if just for a few moments, until and after his release, his mind was focused on his body, and nothing else. In a way, his physical pain brought his body in sync with his emotional state.

It’s impossible to take a photograph of emotional pain, so the images you see here are a physical proxy for how John was feeling that day, on the inside. People who have never found emotional relief through pain won’t understand, but these things that John does are not as risky as much as they are a matter of survival.

(Note: John Marsh an alias I use for myself. He is a fictional character I use to illustrate my crazy bondage and mud adventures. John’s experience is mine; in case that wasn’t obvious.)